The god of war
Body filled with orbs of blood
Possessed with powers green and blue
Pride dragged through the mud
Hate and lust are strong and true
Possessed with powers green and blue
Pride dragged through the mud
Hate and lust are strong and true
Love is smeared across your face
Your hands can not grip tight enough
Coldest stone cannot meet your gaze
Hate and lust are raw and rough
Rage can fuel a pair of blades
Gorgon eyes and phoenix feather
As memories of mercy fades
Hate and lust are merged together
Posted by in 15:45:04
TLK writes:
haha very nice poem.
> Hate and lust are strong and true
> Hate and lust are raw and rough
> Hate and lust are merged together
Hell YEAH! :]
But hey, why such sudden unexpected change? Haven’t you said fanfiction ain’t not your thing? Whatever happened to Scarebaby’s lurkery modus operandi? ;]
Seriously though, interesting, very interesting. Not to say INTENSE
The bit about ‘love SMEARED across the face’; hehheh, perversely thought-provoking ;P
The fragment that mentions ‘hands’ that ‘can not grip tight enough’ sounds somewhat familiar yet in the given context I’m not sure what you refer to…
The absence of ‘love’ in the final line of each stanza - highly notable. No kitch, no corny sentiments. Violent ‘lust’ accompanies the fierce ‘hatred’ instead.
How accurate. How convincing. Just PERFECT. No, really, congratulations - the effect you have achieved is both grimly realistic and powerful
n.
P.S. Loox like your poem has hit a right string in me ;] And even if not exactly a whole razorsharp string… it surely isn’t a piece you forget the moment you have read it ;]
To the point; in the line that says about ‘love smeared across the face’; isn’t ‘love’ - apart from bearing a, nomen omen hehheh, LOAD of perversely ambiguous connotations - a Far Eastern style semi-homophonic pun on… ‘blood’…?
The two words do not sound EXACTLY the same but… y’know…
n.
P.S.2 Ah, that classic MUD/BLOOD rhyme… so very true… and inspiring… hard to resist even, wouldn’t you say, Scarebaby? Yeah, I know ;]
n.
Oh Neuro, how you do flatter me. And I knew you’d give me a hard time over love being smeared across his face! XD
I mean the sad and painful glimpses he gets in his eyes when he throughout the game gets his little flashbacks and relives the moment when he killed his family. He misses the ones he loves and even gets a little misty eyed about it.
And hands that can’t grip tight enough refers to the second part of the ending boss battle where he has to battle a bunch of ”selves” and needs to embrace his wife and child to transfer some of his life to them, but in the end it was all just another trick Ares played and his family remains dead no matter how hard he tried to prevent it.
I’m glad you like it, as I’m quite pleased with it myself. I didn’t think fanfiction was anything for me but the inspiration for this little thing was too powerful for me to resist, it was one of those rare things that sort of ”wrote itself”, if I may sound like a pretentious old stiff.
How are things over at GS? I popped in for some PoP Sand of Time cheats recently but haven’t been active there in quite a while. The distance between the bed and the computer is sometimes unovercome-able. =)
The suggestion that certain texts (or characters) “sort of write themselves” does not sound like a pretentious old stiff. At least not to me. But I’m sure you’re perfectly aware of it ;]
Giving you a hard time? Nah, I’m just curious. The thing is, such an erotic image - and especially the erotic image of this particular kind - in the description of the family protection fight…
Though then each line in that stanza might be a separate unrelated snapshot… was that your intention?
Sad and painful glimpses in the guy’s eyes when he gets his flashbacks? Painful? Yeah, doubtlessly. Sad? Hmmm. Must have missed that :]
Was it something of a: “F***! The bitch used to take care of the house, our Helots and other shit… now she’s f***ing dead and there’s no-one to supervise it all… not to mention that the funerals has gotten ridiculously expencive recenly… and I have two f***king pieces of dead meat to get rid of. O, for f**’s sake… what next!” ;]
The gripping hands are all clear now, thanx.
GS? Haven’t visit the site for a while. There’s not much of any interest for me there now.
BTW. ‘Neuro’? Ah, those cyberpunk sentiments. Gotta finaly read Neuromancer again.
Neuro. A slight slip of the finger on the keyboard would fix the nick into a far more accurate form… and the letter that does the trick… what a symbolic coincidence….:] Nevermind though
Why have you called me Neuro? I came here as nemertes.
Aw geez, I just read a message from Neuro before coming here and she signs her messages with “n.” just like you so I didn’t even reflect over calling you Neuro. But yes yes, you are nemertes, the fanfictioner. =)
Gah, confused Scarebaby…
Btw, this’ll only be a short reply because I’m so effing pissed at this mofo site at the moment; it’s been forcing me to eat my own shit for days now, refusing to let me log in, edit my posts ect etc so I’ll be leaving this shit blog as soon as I get the activation link for my new one.
Aw geez, those coincidences, the confusion, etc… but then such is life :]
The issue whether I am or am not neuro and so on wasn’t exactly discussed here as far as I can recall
I just wondered why having two n-nicks to choose from you chose the one you chose
Anyway; this blog site is shitty? Hmm. It’s seemed okay.
Password issues? Hmmmmmm. Again? Lots of people around me seem to have experienced such problems lately…
You’re moving your blog somewhere else? Damn! Does this mean all my sophisticated intelligent comments are going to be lost…?
Just kidding ;P
Hope to see your new blog complete with longer answer soon
n.